Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Cancer. My dad has been diagnosed with B type Hodgkins Lymphoma and my mind is racing a mile a minute. I just received a phone call from my mother telling me the news, and I can’t quite wrap my mind around what she was telling me.

People that know me and my background know that I don’t often hear from my mother. Seeing their phone number appear on the Caller ID immediately makes me think someone in the family was seriously injured in an accident, is very ill or dead. I haven’t heard from my father since 1995, because I chose to leave the religion I was born into, and the results of that choice were automatic and immediate.

In the eyes of my father and most of my siblings, I died in 1995. All because of my personal decision to leave a religious organization I no longer wanted to be a part of. My mother tends to think of me as being in some sort of coma, hoping that I’ll somehow “come to my senses” and take the required and necessary steps to rejoin the religion.

Doing so would mean I would have been miraculously “resurrected from the dead”, where family members and old friends (who haven’t spoken to me since 1995) would suddenly welcome me back with open arms. Not gonna happen. Ever.

My parents live in Dallas, which is only about a 30-minute drive from our house. Having family members living in such close proximity to our house, but rarely hearing from or seeing any of them, is something I’ve never quite gotten used to. The wounds from the past run very deep, and try as I may to “forgive and forget” everything that happened, forgiving and moving on is easier than the ability to actually forget.

My mother said that my 79-year-old father has very itchy skin, or “eczema” as she called it, which is a classic symptom of Hodgkin’s Disease. She said my father has sores on his legs, is always very tired, takes several naps a day and is no longer able to work doing people’s taxes.

Common symptoms of Hodgkins Disease include:

• Appetite Loss

• Drenching night sweats

• Fatigue

• Fever

• Red patches on the skin

• Severely itchy skin, often affecting the legs and feet

• Weight loss

Some of these general signs and symptoms of Hodgkin’s Disease were mentioned by my mother in regards to my father. I can only assume that the sores on my father’s legs are from persistent scratching of his itchy legs, to the point of causing sores to develop.

Reading about the types of Hodgkin’s Disease makes me very nervous for my dad’s prognosis. From what I’ve read so far, “B symptoms are related to an increased cancer “burden”—more cancerous tissue—in many patients and, therefore, indicate a worse prognosis, or outcome.” We don’t know much more than that at this point.

Tests are scheduled to begin soon to determine the specific “stage of Hodgkins” my father would be categorized as being in at this point, and what treatment options there are for him. I briefly read that Chemotherapy and/or radiation may be treatments recommended for my father, but we’ll know more once the test results are in. That’s about all I can handle reading right now. Rather than dwelling on the possible negative prognosis for my father, I’m doing my best to keep calm and dredge up good memories from the past, and just hope for the best outcome.

Similar Posts:

• Unconditional Love – An Oxymoron
• Look Into The Eyes Of A Child – Part Two
• How to Be a Good Mother-In-Law
• Violence Unsilenced – True Life Personal Survivor Stories of Abuse, Domestic Violence, Rape
• Why Don’t Kids Tell? Talking to Your Children About Sexual Abuse

Did you see Joss Stone and Smokey Robinson sing “You’re The One For Me” on American Idol Thursday, March 26th? Many online reviews of Joss Stone and Smokey Robinson’s performance on American Idol say the duet was “weird” and even “creepy”, due mostly to the age difference and the lack of chemistry. Good grief people, it’s just a duet performance like any other duet, not real life.

I’ve been a huge fan of Smokey Robinson for many years now, and even though Smokey is 69 years old, Smokey’s vocal ability has been consistently smooth throughout all the years he’s been singing. Smokey Robinson now has two well-deserved stars representing him on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, one for his amazing career as a solo artist, and a second star for his contribution as lead singer of the infamous Motown group, The Miracles.

If you missed watching Smokey Robinson and Joss Stone perform “You’re The One For Me” on American Idol, or if you just want to watch it again online, you can see the full performance YouTube video at the American Idol Fan Site as many times as you like.

Robinson and his former backup group were recently honored in a “50 Years of Motown” 50th Anniversary celebration, that included Motown greats Stevie Wonder and Mary Wilson of the original Supremes, as well as Motown founder Berry Gordy. “I’ve had a star for the last 20 years or so, and it is way, way, way, way overdue” for The Miracles, Robinson told the gathered crowd, according to the Associated Press.

50th Anniversary of Motown

January 12, 2009 marked the 50th Anniversary of Motown, 50 years since Berry Gordy borrowed $800 from his family to start his own music label. “Motown music was for everybody, and it grew out of love. It has spread around the world and has become part of the culture and consciousness in all seven continents, and it all started right here”, said Gordy in a statement read during the ceremony by his grand-niece and CEO of the Motown museum, Robin Terry.

Projects to celebrate 50 years of Motown include a two-hour Motown feature-film documentary, produced by Berry Gordy Jr and his associate Suzanne de Passe, planned for a fall 2009 theatrical release. The “NOW That’s What I Call Motown” singles compilation series offers a 25-track greatest hits disc of Motown alum including Marvin Gaye, Gladys Knight & The Pips, Stevie Wonder, The Temptations, Smokey Robinson & The Miracles, The Four Tops, The Supremes and many other classic Motown performers.

Release of the Limited, Collector’s Edition of the “Motown: The Complete No. 1’s” 10-CD boxed set, containing every Motown No.1 hit song + 10 bonus tracks from 50 different Motown artists from all eras. Housed in a replica of the original Motown headquarters house, “Hitsville U.S.A”, on Detroit’s West Grand Boulevard, which is now the home of the internationally renowned Motown Museum.

A Broadway musical is scheduled for 2010, and a special Marvin Gaye exhibit is being planned for later this year at a facility outside Detroit, amongst other 50th anniversary celebrations held this year. Of course, there were also spectacular classic Motown songs performed on American Idol this week in celebration of Motown’s 50 Anniversary, and the official Motown 50 website found at www.classic.motown.com features a weekly podcast series for Motown enthusiasts.

Joss Stone Music and Lyrics

Joss Stone is another of my favorite singers and performers. My collection of Joss Stone musiccontinues to grow, and seeing her perform with Smokey Robinson on American Idol was an added plus. I’ll never forget seeing Joss Stone and Melissa Melissa Etheridge perform “Piece Of My Heart” in tribute to Janis Joplin during the 2005 Grammy Awards, which was considered by most to be one of the highlights of the Awards show.

Joss Stone “Right to Be Wrong” was one of the first Joss Stone songs that got me hooked on her smooth, soulful voice. I download Joss Stone music every time Joss releases a new album, so I check Amazon.com on a regular basis for any and all new song releases on MP3, and I keep up with Joss Stone video performances on YouTube. Yep, I’m a Joss Stone fan for sure, and I can hardly wait for Joss Stone’s “Colour Me Free” to be released in May 2009.

Joss Stone lyrics are pretty easy to come by. Just do an online search for “Joss Stone lyrics”, “Joss Stone Love Lyrics”, “Lyrics to Joss Stone” or even “Joss Stone lyric” and you’ll have more Joss Stone lyrics than you’ll know what to do with.

If you’re an American Idol fan like I am, then be sure to check out and subscribe to the American Idol Fan Site for updates, photos, video, votes, polls, and news on who got voted off American Idol and what Idol contestants are up to.

Similar Posts:

• American Idol Season 9 Auditions at Dallas Cowboys Stadium 2010
• Parents Television Council Says American Idol Finale Crossed the Line
• My Life Would Suck Without You Kelly Clarkson New Song Lyrics
• GoFish Guys Mom Song by Go Fish – Best Mom Songs for Mom
• 7 Things Meme – 7 Things You May Not Know About Me

Empty nest syndrome refers to the feelings of sadness, grief, depression, loneliness, emptiness and loss when children grow up, leave for college, get married, or leave home to live on their own. “Empty-nesters” can either be mothers or fathers, but mothers are primarily the ones who have difficulty dealing with or coping with an empty nest when children begin leaving home to live their lives as adults.

What do I do now?, What can I do now?, are questions empty-nesters commonly ask before, during or after learning their children are leaving home, since parents have spent most of their lives focused on raising children, caring for the home and family, until suddenly the kids are gone.

Are you an empty-nester? Are your children leaving home to head off to college? Are your children getting married soon, moving away or getting their own home? Is your son or daughter leaving home soon, leading you to ask yourself, What do I do after my children leave home?

Empty Nest Syndrome

First, let me say, Congratulations! Give yourself a big pat on the back for having raised your children in such a way that you’re not dealing with adult children living at home years after kids should have left home and begun living their lives as full grown, successful, independent adults.

You have taught your children how to be an adult, and you should be congratulated! You have cut the apron strings by letting go, and the “tied to his mother’s apron strings” quote doesn’t apply to you in regards to your son or daughter leaving home. Trust me, you don’t want to deal with the “revolving door syndrome” so common in today’s society. Good for you!

If you are trying to deal with an empty nest now, or will be an empty-nester sometime soon, please understand you’re not alone. Many moms and dads are trying to cope with empty nest feelings and emotions just like you are, and no two people deal with stressful situations like this the same way, so patience, understanding and empathy are important.

What Do I Do Now? What Can I Do Now?

What do I do after my children leave home? There are many things you can do, should do or need to do now that your children have left home and you are alone at last. It’s time to change your focus on being a parent and the responsibilities of parenting children still living at home, and direct your time and energies towards other things you can do that bring you enjoyment, pleasure and a sense of fulfillment.

Ask yourself, if you could do it all over again, what are some “coulda, shoulda, woulda” things you wish you had done before getting married or before having children? The answer to “What do I do now” is that you now have time to take a life inventory on yourself and start doing the things you have always wanted to do but never could before.

It’s time to get busy! Put your thinking cap on and get those creative juices flowing, and come up with a “What I Can Do Now” list now that the kids are grown and gone. Go back to school to get your high school diploma, or get the college degree you always wanted. Rekindle the romance with your spouse and fire up your marriage by spending time together and bringing back the fun and excitement experienced when you were dating or before the kids came along.

Do some volunteer work; find a new hobby; join an active online support group for encouragement. Travel! Take a cruise, rent an RV and stay at RV parks while traveling, or check out the cost of Flights and buy a plane ticket to visit places you’ve always wanted to see but couldn’t. (I recommend the Philippines) Learn a new language! You can do what I’m doing and learn spanish online, or you can learn japanese online or any other language you have wanted to learn but never had the time.

Or, here’s an idea for you and it’s completely FREE! I bet, after raising your children, you probably have lots of interesting mom, dad, grandpa or grandma stories to tell. Why not start a free blog and write stories about whatever topics you are passionate about? If you’re wondering what is a blog, you’re reading a “blog post” right now about Empty Nest Syndrome. Get it?

Are you dealing with empty nest syndrome? What are some things you have found that helped you cope with your children leaving home? What is on your What I Can Do Now list? Share your ideas, suggestions, tips and advice in the comment section below.

Similar Posts:

• Support Groups for Parents with Grown Adult Children Living at Home with Parents
• 5 Questions About Telling It Like It Is
• A Child’s Ten Commandments For Parents
• Children and Divorce: How to Tell Children About Your Divorce
• Launching Child Safety and Child Sexual Abuse Series

What do I know about being a Grandma? As a grandparent, do I have visitation rights to see my grandchildren? I’m not so sure anymore. Until recently, I had no idea that getting to see my grandson, living out of state, would be next to impossible with current laws being as they are. What visitation rights do grandparents have, if any?

If anyone had told me that getting grandparents visitation rights would be so difficult (or necessary), with me living in Texas and my one-year-old grandson living with his mother in Illinois, I would have thought they were joking. Unfortunately, it’s no joke at all, and I’m not the only grandparent having difficulty in being allowed to see and visit with their own grandchildren.

It came as quite a shock to me when I heard the news that my son and his significant other had split up and went their separate ways even before my grandson was born. Who would have thought that one major fallout of two people ending a relationship and going their separate ways would mean that Grandma and Grandpa would have no right to meet, see or visit our own grandchild as much as possible?

Grandparents Rights

I’ve been spending a lot of time researching grandparent’s rights, to find out what (if any) rights of grandparents there are, in order to get visitation rights to see my grandson living in Illinois. Apparently, there is no such thing as “grandparents rights”, as Illinois law refers to grandparent visitation as a “privilege”, not a right.

I’ve read numerous Illinois and Texas Supreme Court case documents that don’t seem to favor grandparents having the right to see their own grandchildren, but I’m not through yet. I’ve even been told that if I want visitation rights to see my grandchild that I have to move to Illinois and file a court petition and ask the family court judge to grant visitation with my grandson, but the court is not required to give grandparent visitation rights at all.

The law requires that if any legal action is being planned to gain visitation with a grandchild, action must be done in the state where the child resides, that being Illinois in my case. Under Illinois law, grandparent’s must show that “denying visitation will harm the child mentally or physically, and that you are being unreasonably denied visitation by a parent”.

Illinois Visitation Rights

Let me be very clear. I am not seeking grandparent custody of my grandson. I just want opportunities to visit with and bond with my grandson, share in the joys of being a grandmother, exercise my bragging rights by telling Grandma stories, and be a part of his life as he grows up. Is that too much to ask?

My grandson’s mother is a fit and competent young mother, taking very good care of my grandson, from what I hear through the grapevine. Whatever happened between her and my son is a private matter between them and has nothing to do with me.

I attempted to contact her for several months, before and after my grandson was born, in order to clear up any questions or concerns she may have had, only to discover that HER mother and father are the ones pulling the strings and preventing me from knowing my own grandson. Apparently, from their twisted point of view, their grandparent rights trump my right to shared visitation to a grandchild we all share.

After emailing back and forth with my grandson’s mother, and actually making arrangements to see and visit my grandson for the very first time during a recent vacation trip to Illinois, a final email arrived in my inbox saying I wouldn’t be allowed to see my grandchild because her parents said no.

The maternal grandma and grandpa are dictating the rules of who gets to see and spend time with my/our grandson, and because my grandson’s mother lives with her parents in Illinois and I live in Texas, they figure there isn’t much I can do about it.

Grandparents Visitation Rights

According to Illinois Legal Aid, a judge may order grandparent visitation rights to visit with a grandchild if:

• The parental rights of at least one parent have not been terminated, and

• Visitation with your grandchild is in that grandchild’s best interest, and

At least one the following 6 rules are true:

1. Your child (mother or father of your grandchild) has been incarcerated during the 3-month period prior to filing the petition, or has been found to be incompetent, or is dead.
2. The parents of your grandchild are divorced or have been living apart for at least three months.
3. Your grandchild has been abused or neglected by a parent.
4. It has been found by the court that your grandchild is a child in need of supervision.
5. Your child (a parent of your grandchild) has had his or her parental rights to your grandchild terminated.
6. Your grandchild has resided with you for at least six months during the last two years.

Illinois law says grandparents, great-grandparents and siblings can file a petition in a court of law to ask for visitation. Once the petition is filed, it is recommended to continue trying to work out an amicable agreement for a visitation order, otherwise there will be a court trial with witnesses and evidence presented to the judge, wherein the judge will make his ruling.

Illinois Legal Aid says: “If the mother is considered a fit parent, then the court must follow her wishes unless there is a danger of harm to the child. However, Judges will usually try to maintain a healthy and established relationship between grandparents and a grandchild”.

The child’s mother made arrangements with me personally to meet and spend time with my grandson, but the “mother’s wishes” were denied by her parents, and since she is currently living in their home while attending college, they are controlling her life and my right and privilege to visitation with my grandson.

Family law attorneys aren’t cheap by any means, and while I hope to resolve this problem amicably and with no hurt feelings on either side of this issue, I am considering all of my options. Whether or not grandparents rights should be a “right” or a “privilege” is still open for debate, but when it comes to deciding whether or not a grandparent should give up trying to have visitation with their own flesh and blood, giving up isn’t in my nature.

Similar Posts:

• Grandparents Names for Grandparents
• I’m Going To Be A Grandma
• How to Divorce Your Parents, Minors Emancipation, Can You Divorce Your Parents?
• Today is My Birthday: Happy Birthday to Me
• Taking Care of Aging Parents as a Family

Most Popular Blog Posts

When I decided to start a blog with my very first blog post more than two years ago, I didn’t know anything about creating a blog where I could share parenting advice, marriage and relationship advice etc, but I knew that starting a blog that wasn’t just a personal blog all about me was something I was/am passionate about and I look forward to creating many more popular blog posts in 2009.

As we ring in the New Year, I’d like to share some of the most popular blog posts from Telling It Like It Is, based on popularity, number of views and/or comments, and a few of my personal favorites thrown in for good measure.

1. Why Are Women So Strange and Men So Weird?
2. Are Parents Helping Or Enabling Their Adult Children?
3. Inside the Minds of Angry, Controlling and Abusive Men
4. Helping and Enabling – Is There A Difference?
5. How to Get Along With the In-Laws: Dealing With In-Laws and Extended Family
6. Toxic Relationships – Toxic Family Members
7. Keeping the Fire Alive in Your Marriage
8. How to Spice Up Your Marriage: Fun and Easy Ways to Add Romance to Your Relationship
9. Zero Tolerance for Disrespectful, Cussing Kids
10. So Sexy, So Soon: The Sexualization of Childhood in Commercial Culture
11. Building Self-Confidence in Children with Self-Esteem Activities
12. Understanding Assertiveness: Getting The Respect You Deserve
13. Child Sexual Abuse: Facts VS. Myths
14. Taking Care of Aging Parents as a Family
15. Evaluating And Choosing The Right Niche For Your Personality And Passion
16. Can I Get Paid to Care for a Family Member: Elderly Mother or Father?
17. How to Be a Good Mother-In-Law
18. A Sense of Entitlement
19. Children and Divorce: How to Tell Children About Your Divorce
20. 10 Ways to Raise Children to USE Drugs
21. The Lolita Effect: The Media Sexualization of Young Girls and What We Can Do About It
22. How to Fight Fair in Marriage
23. Computer Monitoring Software- Do You Know What Your Kids Are Doing Online?
24. How to Spot a Gold Digger
25. Miley Cyrus AKA Hanna Montana Going Topless For Vanity Fair

Similar Posts:

• Telling It Like It Is is on Staycation
• Divorce Books: Divorce Children’s Books
• How to Get Along With the In-Laws: Dealing With In-Laws and Extended Family
• Archive Posts Meme-Tag, You’re It!
• Support Groups for Parents with Grown Adult Children Living at Home with Parents

The Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) has released a new nursing home rating system on its website to help make choosing a nursing home easier for senior citizens and their families.

The 5-star rating system used for all 15,800 U.S. nursing homes that participate in Medicare or Medicaid, similar to rating systems for hotels and restaurants, has some nursing home operators worried about how their business will fair with this new rating system.

The ratings are based on health inspection surveys, staffing information and quality of care measures, such as the percentage of residents with pressure sores. The nursing homes will receive stars for each of those categories as well as for their overall quality. Only 10% of nursing homes received the highest five-star rating, and 20% received just one star in the first round of ratings. Which nursing home is your parent or grandparent living in and what rating did it receive?

Now the general public can know which nursing homes got a low rating and which received the highest rating of 5, but of course there are those in the nursing home industry desperately trying to poke holes in the rating system from the get-go by saying the system is “is poorly planned, prematurely implemented and ham-handedly rolled out”.

“What you have with the five-star system is a very well-thought-out way of summarizing all of that information that was available on the earlier site with new information. This allows you to do a much more direct comparison in a user-friendly way” said Charles Phillips, a professor of health policy and management at Texas A&M Health Science Center School of Rural Public Health in College Station. “The old site had a lot of information, but the information wasn’t necessarily terribly usable by the average consumer. You knew if the facility was above or below the state average, but you didn’t know what that meant”.

Families caring for elderly parents have a weighty responsibility trying to deal with providing needed care and attention to elderly parents, and the struggle to find quality nursing home care weighs heavily on the hearts and minds of caring families. Many family members incorrectly assume good quality nursing care and they often don’t know what questions to ask when trying to choose a nursing home, and that’s where this rating system can be an important educational tool for families.

Alice H. Hedt, executive director of the National Citizens’ Coalition for Nursing Home Reform, said consumers should consider the star ratings, but not solely rely on them when comparing nursing facilities. “Our initial reaction is that consumers should probably avoid any facility with a one- or two-star rating and even a three-star rating unless people they trust convince them that the rating is inaccurate or unfair,” she said. Her organization also issued a press release warning that nursing homes may appear in the ratings to give better care than they actually do.

“There are other quality-of-life issues they are very concerned about: the atmosphere, cleanliness, ratio of nursing professionals, the ability to go visit. None of that is reflected in what gives this a five-star rating”, said Debra Greenberg, a senior social worker at Montefiore Medical Center and Albert Einstein College of Medicine in New York City.

The decision to put a family member in a nursing home is very stressful and emotionally charged for many families. Anyone considering placing an elderly parent in a nursing home should talk to the local nursing home ombudsman and take the initiative to physically go and visit each nursing home facility being considered several times (unannounced) in order to get a real first-hand look inside the nursing home.

Some families are intent on taking care of elderly parents themselves, with the help of programs that offset some of the financial stress and hardships, rather than placing their mother or father in a nursing home. The decision as to whether to put mom or dad in a nursing home or not is a personal one, and the general public has the right to know as much as possible about how nursing homes are rated and why each nursing home received either low ratings or high ratings in order to make the best possible decision for their parents and family.

Medicare’s Nursing Home Compare

Similar Posts:

• Kids In Mind Parental Movie Ratings With Your Kids In Mind
• Caring For Our Elderly Parents
• Can I Get Paid to Care for a Family Member: Elderly Mother or Father?
• Taking Care of Aging Parents as a Family
• The End Is Near

I’ve been searching for grandparent names and names for grandparents with various search terms, but I can honestly say that the typical grandparent names are just too old-fashioned for someone like me. Grandmother? Grandfather? Grandma? Grandpa? Bleh! Seriously, where are the cool grandparent names for us hip grandmas?

You may recall my announcement about becoming a grandparent several months ago. I’ll be visiting my grandson James in February for his 1st Birthday, and I still don’t have a grandparent nickname yet, so if I don’t choose a nickname soon I’ll be in big trouble.

Considering the fact that the chosen name or nickname will stick with me throughout my life and beyond, I figure I need to have some say over what I’m going to be called. I’ve searched for “grandparent nicknames”, “nicknames for grandma”, “names for grandmother”, “alternative names for grandparents”, “unique cute names for grandparents” and various other terms to find different names for grandparents to choose from, but the results have been disappointing to say the least.

Do an online search for “grandparent names” and you will find such hideous names for grandparents like Big Mama, Bucket Head, Butter Butt, Chicken Nana, Grumpy, Chippy, Blah-Blah, Dodo, MooMoo/PooPoo, and Peaches and Pitts. Are you kidding me?!

If anything, such nicknames for grandma or grandpa would make my list of the worst grandfather and grandmother nicknames anyone could ever name their grandparents. I can honestly tell you that any child or grandchild who calls me Butter Butt or Big Momma is out of the will. And don’t call me Grandma!

Right when I was about to give up hope of ever finding a great nickname for grandmas to use, a friend told me about this newly released book called “You Can Call Me Hoppa! The Grandparents’ Guide to Choosing a Name that Fits” by Lauren Charpio, written specifically with the baby-boomer grandparents in mind. With somewhere around three hundred grandparent names found in this book, surely us grandparents can find a cool nickname that doesn’t make us feel so incredibly old before our time.

Come to think of it, the nickname “Chief” sounds pretty good to me right about now. No? How about “The Boss”? G-Ma? Okay, the grandparent book of names is on its way to me, so surely I’ll have something picked out soon enough. Are you a grandparent? What do your grandchildren call you? What were your grandparents names?

Related Posts:

I’m Going To Be A Grandma
How to Be a Good Step-Parent
Mean Mom 101 – Lessons Learned From My Mean Mom
Support Groups for Parents with Grown Adult Children Living at Home with Parents

Similar Posts:

• I’m Going To Be A Grandma
• Grandma Stories-Grandma and Grandpa Visitation Rights-What Do I Know?
• Today is My Birthday: Happy Birthday to Me
• Happy Holidays Merry Christmas With a Capitol C
• Taking Care of Aging Parents as a Family

Sex every day is most men’s fantasy, whereas most women dream of emotional intimacy in their marriage or relationship, as well as a satisfying sex life. The 30 Day Sex Challenge is a marriage enrichment program, developed by Tampa Florida’s Relevant Church Head Pastor Paul Wirth, for married couples to determine their personal and unique emotional needs in order to build upon and improve their marital relationship.

Cheating Spouse

Is he cheating? Is she cheating? Is your spouse cheating? Why do men cheat? Why do women cheat? Lack of intimacy in marriage or dating relationships. Men want and need intimacy too, despite the common and mistaken belief that all men have a fear of intimacy or that all men have commitment phobia.

The differences between men and women in communication styles often create marriage problems and marital conflict that can sometimes lead to an unhappy marriage, broken marriage, separation and divorce, sometimes due to a cheating husband (cheating boyfriend) or wives cheating (cheating girlfriends) as well as other relationship problems.

Relationship experts agree that the main reason why men cheat (or why women cheat) is because both of the individuals are not meeting each others deepest emotional needs and then wonder why they are not connecting on a sexual level and enjoying sexual fulfillment within the bounds of their own marriage or relationship.

Affair Proof Marriage

In order to have an affair-proof marriage, couples must take the time to learn how to communicate effectively and learn each others needs and desires, working together to ensure a strong, intimate, emotional connection to their spouse rather than looking outside the marriage to have emotional and sexual needs met.

Regardless of the excuses and so-called “reasons” why husbands cheat or why wives cheat, cheating is wrong and immoral, and there is no legitimate way to minimize the effects of marriage infidelity on marriages and children.

30 Day Sex Challenge

The 30 Day Sex Challenge is intended to help couples succeed in creating an affair proof marriage by breaking the sex challenge up into four mini-challenges: spiritual, emotional, sexual, and physical. Using a holistic approach, the Relevant Church developed an assortment of resources to help couples, such as an emotional needs questionnaire, a 30-day devotional guide for married couples, and a 30-day devotional guide for singles.

The sex challenge series is biblically and scripturally based, teaching singles that the Relevant Church (if not all churches) believe that God has reserved sex for married couples and if done God’s way, married sex can and should be the best sex of their lives.

***Also See: How to Please a Woman in Bed, Pleasure and Satisfy Her Completely***

To “have a stable relationship you need to be connecting spiritually, emotionally, and sexually and in that order”, says Paul Wirth. For the sex challenge, single men and women can’t have sex for 30 days, and married couples are urged to have sex every day.

The Sex Challenge:

• Each person, whether single or married, take the emotional needs test, then daily begin to meet the needs of the other person without thinking of themselves

• Each person fills out the daily journal after reading the questions and the scripture verses, and then write down his or her answers to the questions and thoughts about the verses

• Then the couples exchange journals with their partners and discuss them.

• Last the married couples are to be sexually intimate every day for 30 days (sex is more than just intercourse) and single couples are to abstain from sex for 30 days (any form of sex)

Couples participating in the sex challenge work through questions that deal with personal feelings, fears, uncertainties and joys that come up because of the sex challenge, helping couples build intimacy into the relationship and give the couple a fresh passion for each other. It makes for a win-win relationship.

Married couples can and need to take necessary steps to keep the fire alive in their marriage, not only with good communication but also with selfless giving in and out of the bedroom, which works well to affair proof your marriage.

Openly discussing emotional and sexual needs before getting married is vital for a healthy and happy marriage, and discussions of sex in marriage should never be a taboo subject after the wedding, otherwise how will your husband or wife know what you want or need emotionally or sexually in order to feel happy and fulfilled in your marriage?

Make the decision today to affair proof your marriage by taking the 30 Day Sex Challenge , discover each others emotional, sexual and spiritual needs, and take steps to fill those needs within your marriage. You just might discover that 30 Days of sex, sex every day with your husband or wife, makes for a very enjoyable habit to develop.

His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage
Questions Before Marriage – Questions to Ask Before Getting Married
Keeping the Fire Alive in Your Marriage
How to Spice Up Your Marriage
The Art of a Good Marriage
How to Fight Fair in Marriage
What Does it Mean to “Leave and Cleave?”

Similar Posts:

• A Marriage Without Regrets – Do You Regret Getting Married?
• Top 10 List of Favorite Links
• Keeping the Fire Alive in Your Marriage
• How to Tell Your Parents You Are Getting Married
• Questions Before Marriage – Questions to Ask Before Getting Married

Guy Finley is the best-selling author of The Secret of Letting Go and more than 36 other Finley books and audio albums that have sold over a million copies in 15 languages worldwide. Finley’s self-realization seminars to thousands of Guy Finley fans throughout North America and Europe, as well as Finley’s guest appearances on over 400 television and radio shows, has received widespread endorsements by doctors, business professionals, celebrities and religious leaders of all denominations praising Finley’s audio albums, books, DVDs, eBooks, tapes and CDs.

Guy Finley, born February 22, 1949, son of late-night talk show pioneer and celebrity Larry Finley, has made national appearances on ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN, NPR, Wisdom Network, amongst many others. Finley’s radio program, Guy Finley Live, is a live chat that airs monthly on HealthyLife.net as part of the network’s Visionary Celebrity Host Series. Finley is also a faculty member of the Omega Institute, the nation’s largest and most trusted holistic education provider.

Before becoming the Director of Life of Learning Foundation, Guy Finley enjoyed success composing award-winning music for many popular recording artists including Diana Ross, Debbie Boone, The Jackson 5, Billy Preston, The Four Seasons, as well as Guy’s work in television and motion pictures as an actor and writing music scores for several motion pictures and TV shows. From 1970-1979, Finley wrote and recorded his own albums under the Motown and RCA recording labels.

In 1979, Finley chose to retire from his music career to simplify his life and to concentrate on deeper self-studies, traveling throughout North America, India and the Far East in search of truth and Higher Wisdom. As co-founder of the nationally recognized self-development program, “Success Without Stress”, Guy now travels and lectures nationwide on the principles of Higher Life, helping millions live fuller, more peaceable lives with his new flagship program Secrets of Being Unstoppable.

Secrets of Being Unstoppable

Guy Finley’s Secrets of Being Unstoppable audio package is a collection of 16 groundbreaking CD audio talks that explain how to transform our limitless inborn potential into the reality of a truly limitless life! CD titles include:

1. The Secret of Being Unstoppable
2. The Three Pillars of Spiritual Power
3. Secrets of Higher, Happier Spiritual Power
4. 5 Simple Steps to Make Yourself Fearless
5. The Power to Let Go and Live in the Now
6. The Will and the Way to Win in Life
7. Freedom to Forgive: the Power to Put the Past Behind You
8. Four Steps to Turn Any Problem Into a Pleasant Surprise
9. Relax Your Way to a Richer Life
10. The Eight Great False Responsibilities of Life
11. Awaken the Greatness Within
12. Attract the Happiness Your Heart Longs For
13. Go Beyond Guilt and Regret to Realize a New You
14. 5 Words to Make You the Master of Your Life
15. 10 Traits of Spiritually Productive People
16. Awaken the Power of Your Supernatural Self

Guy Finley’s Free Self-Improvement Starter Kit includes the immensely practical ‘30 Keys to Change Your Destiny’ ebook; a phenomenal 7-min MP3 audio program, ‘Seek the Source of Self-Perfection’; a stirring online video program, ‘What Your Heart Has Been Longing to Hear’; plus two helpful posters, ‘5 Great Lessons to Help You Let Go and Live In the Now’ and ‘7 Laws of Fearless Living.’ A $47 combined value.

Finley Books by Guy Finley

1. The Secret of Letting Go 
2. Freedom From the Ties That Bind
3. Design Your Destiny: The Power to Shape Your Future
4. The Intimate Enemy: Winning the War Within Yourself
5. The Lost Secrets of Prayer: Practices for Self-Awakening
6. Seeker’s Guide to Self-Freedom: Truths for Living
7. Apprentice of the Heart
8. Let Go and Live in the Now: Awaken the Peace, Power and Happiness in Your Heart
9. 365 Days to Let Go: Daily Insights to Change Your Life
10. NEW! The Essential Laws of Fearless Living: Find the Power to Never Feel Powerless Again

Guy Finley’s Audio Tapes and CD’s

1. Education of the Soul: Answering the Longing for Immortality
2. Liberation of Consciousness
3. Living Now: Secrets of the Extraordinary Life
4. Seven Powers: Building Bridges to Your Higher Possibility
5. Secrets of Being Unstoppable
6. Seven Steps to Oneness: Journey to a Whole New Life
7. Teachings of the Timeless Kindness (On Clearance in the “Special Value Center”)
8. The Genesis of Love: Relationship Magic in Heaven and on Earth
9. The Heart & Soul of Freedom: Liberation From Limitation
10. The Illusion of Limitation: The Liberation of Self
11. The Meditative Life
12. The Turning Point: The Power of a Life Awakened

Similar Posts:

• The Confident Woman
• The Expectant Father Audiobook Giveaway Random Drawing
• Last Minute Christmas Gift Ideas for Xmas 2008
• Setting Boundaries With Your Adult Children: Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents
• Books on Sexual Abuse-Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse-Healing Sexual Abuse

Yes, you CAN quit smoking cigarettes and stop smoking for good. You can quit smoking today, right now at this very minute. The reasons to quit smoking are well-known, and there are many methods to stop smoking which will help you lead a happier, healthier, smoke-free life, where you can proudly say “I quit smoking” once and for all. You can and need to decide to quit smoking right now, today.

Why is it so hard to quit smoking? Because of nicotine. Nicotine addiction, a drug found in tobacco, is just as addictive as heroin or cocaine. Mark Twain once said, “Quitting smoking is easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.” Quitting smoking is not easy, but it can be done. Even if you have quit smoking before, but started smoking again, you are not a failure. You just need help, encouragement, advice and “quit smoking support” in order to kick the habit and stop smoking for good.

The US Surgeon General says, “Smoking cessation (stopping smoking) represents the single most important step that smokers can take to enhance the length and quality of their lives.”

The dangers of smoking and negative affects on your overall health and well-being as well as the health risks associated with secondhand smoke, has lead to nationwide smoking bans in public places including workplaces, restaurants and bars. Research studies show smoking bans help decrease the number of cigarettes people smoke and may help people quit smoking successfully once and for all.

Withdrawal Symptoms

Quitting smoking is hard because smokers must learn how to quit smoking and how to deal with nicotine withdrawal symptoms while trying to quit, such as:

• Dizziness

• Depression

• Irritability, anger

• Anxiety, restlessness

• Sleep disturbances such as insomnia, bad dreams or nightmares

• Difficulty in concentration

• Headaches, fatigue

• Increased appetite and concerns about possible weight gain when quitting smoking (yes you can quit smoking without gaining weight)

It’s very important for smokers to seriously consider the benefits of quitting smoking, and the positive affects quitting will have on your own health and body when you give up smoking, as well as the decreased risks involved with secondhand smoke on those around you.

Making the decision to stop smoking right now isn’t just for your own good. Kicking your smoking habit also creates a healthier environment for your children and loved ones, but also helps protect the general public from the damaging affects of cigarette smoke.

What Happens When You Quit Smoking

• In 20 minutes your blood pressure and pulse rate will decrease and drop back down to normal and the body temperature of your hands and feet increase.

• At 8 hours the carbon monoxide levels in your blood stream will drop by half, and blood oxygen levels will return to normal due to the decrease in carbon monoxide. Carbon monoxide in cigarette smoke reduces the blood’s ability to carry oxygen.

• In 24 hours your risk of having a heart attack will have decreased.

• In 48 hours all nicotine will have left your body, nerve endings start to re-grow and your sense of taste and smell return to normal levels.

• In 72 hours your bronchial tubes will relax, and your energy levels will increase.

• Between 2 weeks and 3 months your circulation improves, walking and exercise becomes easier, coughing and wheezing is greatly reduced, phlegm production is reduced, and overall lung function continues to improve significantly.

• In three to nine months coughing, wheezing, sinus congestion, fatigue, shortness of breath and breathing problems dissipate as you see significant improvement in lung capacity and function.

• In 1 year your risk of coronary heart disease and risk of heart attack will have dropped by half that of a smoker.

• Between 5 to 10 years after quitting smoking your risk of having a stroke or developing lung cancer will have returned to that of a non-smoker.

• In 15 years your risk of having a heart attack will have returned to that of a non-smoker.

How to Quit Smoking

What is the best way to stop smoking? Some smokers quit smoking cold turkey and never crave or pick up a cigarette again for the rest of their lives. Others have stopped smoking with the help of the quit smoking book “The Easy Way to Stop Smoking” with very good success rates. Many smokers have achieved success in quitting smoking with the help of the Stop Smoking CD, with once-skeptical smokers discovering they were able to quit smoking once and for all, after being unable to quit with other methods.

Other smokers have been able to quit smoking with the help of stop smoking aids, often referred to as Nicotine Replacement Therapy. Nicotine replacement therapy (NRTs) include stop smoking products like nicotine gum, the nicotine inhaler/nasal spray, nicotine lozenges and nicotine patches. NRTs contain nicotine and can be addictive themselves, but if you follow the manufacturer’s directions carefully to wean yourself off the chosen NRT, this can be a safe and comfortable way to put an end to your smoking addiction.

Quit smoking medication like Chantix (developed by Pfizer, Inc. and approved by the FDA) reduces the smokers cravings for nicotine when he or she quits smoking. A person who smokes while using Chantix finds his smoking satisfaction and enjoyment is greatly reduced due to the drug’s ability to block nicotine from binding with the nicotinic receptors in the brain. Chantix is by prescription only.

Zyban, Wellbutrin SR, and Wellbutrin XL have also been shown to dramatically reduce withdrawal symptoms associated with nicotine, and is also by prescription only. When considering any stop smoking medications to help you quit smoking, carefully review any and all known side effects of each drug. Chantix, for example, has been reported as having unhealthy side effects such as sleep disturbances, nausea and suicidal thoughts.

Other alternative options to stop smoking include hypnosis and acupuncture, and while some have seen good results, others have not been successful in quitting with either option. The stop smoking shot (Smart, Welplex or Quit 1-2-3) costs around $400.00 or more, and is injected behind the ears. Ouch! Smart is a one shot injection while Welplex or Quit 1-2-3 are three dosed shots, followed by pills and nicotine patches, so be sure to have a conversation with your doctor before deciding on stop smoking shots given at clinics.

Quit Smoking Now! Your efforts to quit smoking once and for all will be greatly enhanced by joining and participating in support groups with other like-minded people trying to stop smoking for good, with the support group called CafeMom being one of many. Congratulations on your decision to quit smoking and kicking the habit once and for all!



Similar Posts:

• Chantix – Miracle Drug Or Silent Killer?
• Nail Biting: Causes, Consequences, Cure-How to Stop Biting Your Nails
• It’s Time to Change Careers and Quit My Job
• How Much Television Is Too Much Television For Children?
• Childhood Obesity: Treatment and Prevention of Obesity in Children