Telling It Like It Is

Recession Christmas – 12 Frugal Christmas Present Gift Ideas

Ready or not, the Christmas season is upon us. Stores are stocking up on anything and everything related to Christmas gift-giving, while many families are trying to find ways to survive Christmas during a recession. Christmas may not seem so “Merry” for those affected by job layoffs, home foreclosures and in some cases, outright poverty. Many families are in need of life’s basic necessities, due in part to the economic downturn, and will be in need of Christmas donations from those more fortunate.

According to a survey by Ing Direct, only about half of American adults (54%) plan to spend $300.00 or more on holiday Christmas gifts this year, a 10% decrease from what Americans spent last year during the 2008 Christmas holiday season. The survey results show that only 11% plan to spend between $1 and $100 in 2009 on Xmas gifts, and 23% plan to spend $100-$299, compared to 21 percent last year.

11% of those surveyed don’t plan to spend any money at all on Christmas toys or gifts in 2009, compared to 7 percent in 2008, a 57 percent increase. 14% of parents are giving children smaller Christmas stockings this year, while others are choosing to not fill Xmas stockings at all, and some will just hang the stockings as a Christmas decoration. Older Americans (55 years old and up) show the most dramatic change, with 61% planning to spend $300 or more dollars on gifts this year, compared to 71% from last year.

41% of Americans say saving more and spending less is a top priority for the remainder of the year and beyond. According to Forbes.com, 67% of Americans say they will continue their frugal ways by saving more money and spending less even after the economy recovers. The recession creates a great opportunity to rethink priorities in life, with less focus on luxuries and frivolous spending, and greater importance being placed on real “needs” vs. “wants”.

If you are being frugal by choice or by sheer necessity, Christmas presents a financial challenge for those who are needing a less expensive, affordable Christmas holiday. Here are twelve inexpensive, frugal Christmas gift ideas that won’t break the bank.
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Posted in Children, Holidays, Men, Reviews, Shopping, Teenagers, Women on September 7, 2009

Tags: Tags: being frugal, christmas donations, christmas gifts, christmas stockings, christmas toys, frugal christmas gifts, Frugal living, recession christmas, xmas gifts

9 Comments »

This is My Blog and I Will Blog Whatever I Want

Yes, this is MY blog and I will blog or write about whatever I want, thank you very much. I almost titled this post, “Telling It Like It Is is Not For the Faint of Heart”, which on some levels is very true.

Over the last several months there have been an increasing number of what I refer to as lurkers, spammers, trolls, haters, naysayers and perverts emailing me and attempting to leave pathetic comments on posts.

Some of the worst offenders are those arriving from those pesky “DoFollow blog lists”, where newbie bloggers show up like a bat out of hell, dive-bombing this site in hopes of getting a link back to their site by leaving a pathetic “great blog, keep it up” sort of comment. If you have a blog of your own, you are likely well aware of these pests.

Telling It Like It Is has a comment policy and privacy policy like all/most other blogs and websites have, including a “mark as spam” button and a “delete” button, which I use quite frequently. If “DoFollow” dive bombers wish to continue wasting their time targeting this site for a backlink, knock yourselves out…but if you ever decide to check back to see if your “comment” was approved…you’ll be sadly mistaken.

Running a close second behind the dive bombers are those who are none too happy that I continue to write about child sexual abuse, especially the articles that tell kids and victims to tell they are being sexually abused now or were sexually abused by someone in the past.

I have received emails and attempted comments from people who are not happy at all that the Protect Our Children Act was passed. Now, readers, you tell me…what kind of person would NOT want me or anyone else having the “audacity” to be telling kids to tell someone they are or were sexually abused? Think about that for a minute, then come to your own conclusions.
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Posted in Abuse, Children, Education, Men, Relationships, Women on August 31, 2009

Tags: Tags: audacity, child sexual abuse, facebook, Google Alerts, stumbleupon, twitter, woopra, writer's block

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Blurt! The Uproarious Word Race Game Review and Giveaway

Do you and your family enjoy playing fun board games? If so, the new Blurt! game is a must-have for family game night and parties with friends. Blurt! The Uproarious Word Race Game is back with a brand new 2009 edition, after having been sold by the original publisher and taken off of the market for several years.

The first and original Blurt! game was the brain-child of Tim Walsh in 1990, as he was trying to help keep 3rd grade students quiet in their classroom, and failing miserably. Tim was dating a teacher at the time (who he later married) and says, “My job was to quietly entertain a few kids in the corner of her classroom while she worked with the rest of her students on year-end projects.”

Browsing through some books with the students, Tim opened a dictionary and began to read aloud to himself, “The nut of an oak tree.” The 8-year-old students didn’t stay quiet for long. One child mumbled, “Oaknut”, but Tim smiled and said “No, it’s an acorn”. Continuing on with more word clues and seeing the children get more excited as they guessed at the answer, a light bulb went off in Tim’s mind and he knew he had discovered a great new game.

Blurt! was originally released as “Blurt! The Webster’s Game of Word Racing” in 1994 by a small puzzle company in Wisconsin, going on to win numerous awards and entertain families, selling its 1,000,000th copy in 2000.

“Blurt! was invented for kids, obviously, it came out of a classroom”, says Walsh. “Families and kids love it because it’s fast and fun, but go on YouTube and you’ll find more than a few school and college-age kids playing it and having a blast too. It’s not intimidating like trivia and it’s hilarious what people Blurt on in the heat of play.”

The newly updated Blurt! game is better than ever, with new words and clues that make game night fun for all, which now includes a Junior version of the Blurt game for children ages 7-9. Here’s a test of your “blurting” abilities: Think fast. What word means “a partially dried grape”? Hurry! If you are the first player to blurt out “raisin”, you’re well on your way to winning this uproariously funny board game of rapid word recall called Blurt!
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Posted in Children, Family, Men, Reviews, Shopping, Teenagers, Women on August 13, 2009

Tags: Tags: Blurt game, Blurt!, board games

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101 Nights of Grrreat Sex: Secret Sealed Seductions for Fun-Loving Couples

This is a guest book review by Dr Michelle Gannon, a Psychologist/Relationship Expert in private practice in San Francisco. She is also the founder of Award Winning Marriage Prep 101 Workshops with her husband, Dr Patrick Gannon www.MarriagePrep101.com. You can find her on Twitter.com/DrMichellexo

Book Review: 101 Nights of Grrreat Sex by Laura Corn.

Many couples begin their relationship with the anticipation and excitement of a new romantic and sexual partner. In the beginning, most people find their sex lives pleasurable, exciting and interesting enough. When we fall in love, we release the feel good hormone called dopamine.

When we are sensual and sexual, we release the bonding hormone called oxytocin. So the good news is that the early years are fueled by both dopamine and oxytocin. However, these hormones wear off over time.

Also, the daily pressure and stress of working, raising children, dealing with finances and taking care of so many tasks can take a toll on one’s interest in sex and love making. If you think about it, it also makes sense that making love the same way to the same person year after year could get a little routine, mundane and even boring.

The good news is that couples can reclaim their sexual relationship, and even re-invent it to be more playful and exciting.
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Posted in Dating, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Women on August 12, 2009

Tags: Tags: laura corn, making love, sex, sex books, sexual relationship

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Violence Unsilenced – True Life Personal Survivor Stories of Abuse, Domestic Violence, Rape

If you or someone you know is being abused or has been a victim of abuse, domestic violence, rape or molestation, it’s vital that you do something right now. Tell someone.

The culture of silence, fear and shame for survivors of abuse must end. Children who have been sexually abused don’t tell because they’re afraid, and that fear of telling is what the abuser is counting on to keep you silent for the rest of your life. If you don’t speak up and tell someone you are being abused now, or were physically or sexually assaulted at some point in the past, your abuser maintains control over you and your life.

You may have been threatened with further violence if you dare tell anyone that you were sexually assaulted, raped or beaten. You may feel you are all alone with the secret you have been keeping, or that no one would understand or believe you.

You are not alone. Abuse survivors and advocates do understand, will believe you and can provide needed encouragement and support to help you find your voice and end the cycle of abuse. How do I know? Because I’ve been there myself. I was afraid to tell anyone I was sexually abused as a child, fearing no one would believe me or do anything about it, but I found my voice and told my story anyway.

Years later I got married and became a victim of domestic violence by the man who vowed to love and cherish me “till death do us part”, but I found the courage and strength to leave and got a divorce. I took my power back, and because of that I don’t see myself as a victim. No, I am a survivor.
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Posted in Abuse, Children, Men, Teenagers, Women on August 10, 2009

Tags: Tags: abuse survivors, child sexual abuse, personal stories of sexual abuse, sexual assault, survivors of abuse, victim of domestic violence

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How to Please a Woman in Bed, Pleasure and Satisfy Her Completely

This is a guest post by Lissa at Owning Pink, a website and a series of women’s workshops committed to empowering women to reclaim their health, their girlytude, and their mojo.

When Lin asked me to write about how to make love to a woman, I felt myself blush. After all, I’m a gynecologist, not a sexpert. Wouldn’t she be better served by asking some Casanova or, better yet, a lesbian? As the founder of Owning Pink: A Gutsy Guide to Getting Your Mojo Back (www.owningpink.com), I’m all about helping women embrace joy and get in touch with their authentic selves. But, how to please a woman in bed? Hmmm. My husband and I were just in the bedroom last night, working on making our own sex life a bit more exciting, so I can honestly say I’m no sexual rock star.

However, after thinking about it for a while I realized, to my surprise, that after ten years of working with women and teaching women’s workshops, I guess I have learned a thing or two on the topic. So if you’re aiming to satisfy a woman in the sack, we girls beg you, pay attention.

20 Tips For Making a Woman Quiver

1. Every woman is different. If your super-duper signature technique had your last girlfriend hanging from the chandeliers and bellowing out to Mother Mary, good for you. But don’t expect the same thing to work on your new lover. Our bodies- and needs- vary drastically. One size does not fit all.

2. A woman’s body is like an old beater car in subzero weather. It takes a while to warm her up. Don’t expect a warm welcome if you go from zero to sixty straight to her coochie. Foreplay will take you far. Our bodies sometimes need a little coaxing. So often we live completely in our heads. Our minds are spinning with thoughts about work, the kids, and tomorrow’s to-do list. If you help bring us into our bodies by arousing different erogenous zones, like the ears, the lips, the breasts, the inner thigh, the belly button, even the toes, you help remind us that our bodies can offer pleasure if we only inhabit them.

3. Love her and earn her trust. For most women, sex and love get all tangled. Not to say there aren’t some Samantha’s out there who love to just get it on. But for most of us, we see sex as an expression of love, and if we don’t feel nurtured by you, we may not get all hot and bothered when you want to shake the sheets. Love her well and earn her trust. Pleasure will likely follow.

4. Set the mood in the bedroom. Surprise her with candles, mood music, and a flower on her pillow. Whisper sweet nothings. Don’t serve up silly platitudes, but say what you feel. When we cover our bellies with our hands and try to turn off the light, tell us we’re beautiful, just the way we are. Share how much you care. Romance gets her in the mood and helps her relax.
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Posted in Dating, Family, Marriage, Men, Relationships, Women on August 7, 2009

Tags: Tags: how to make love, how to make love to a woman, how to please a woman, how to please a woman in bed

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Allen Birthing Center, Dallas Midwife Birthing Options, American Association Birth Centers

The Allen Birthing Center, located in historic downtown Allen Texas, is the birthing center my daughter chose to deliver her baby in May 2009. Allen Birthing Center is a free-standing birth center, staffed by 3 experienced and highly-educated certified nurse-midwives (CNMs), offering prenatal care, labor support, delivery and exam of the newborn, postpartum care, well-woman exams, family planning, and primary care.

As soon as my daughter learned about her pregnancy, she had what seemed like a million questions and fears for a first-time mother, which is understandable. We discussed birthing options, the average cost of delivering a baby in a hospital vs. a birthing center or homebirth, pros and cons of each option etc, so she could make an informed choice for herself and her baby.

I was very careful to just explain the facts of each option because I didn’t want her to feel any pressure or influence from me about how or where to have her baby. Just because I chose the home birth option to deliver her and her older brother, and hospital births for my first four children, doesn’t mean she should make the same choice I did.

My daughter asked me, “If you could do it all over again, which option would you choose now?” I had to be honest and tell her that if I had known years ago about certified midwives, birthing centers and homebirth options, I would have chosen to give birth to each of my children at home. The differences between laboring and delivering a baby in a hospital vs. delivering at home or at a birthing center for low-risk pregnancies are huge.

I suggested she check out Ricki Lake’s Business of Being Born documentary, and explained that she needed to create a birth plan where she would list her personal preferences for labor and delivery, including how and where she would decide to give birth. I also explained that she needed to decided whether or not she wanted pain medication or an epidural for pain relief during labor, because that would have everything to do with where she would labor and deliver her baby.
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Posted in Dating, Family, Health, Men, Parenting, Relationships, Reviews, Teenagers, Women on August 3, 2009

Tags: Tags: allen birthing center, average cost of delivering a baby, birth center, birthing centers, cost of delivering a baby, homebirth, hospital births, labor and delivery

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Lessons In Frugality

This is a guest post from Sherri at Serene Journey, where she shares tips, tricks and philosophies on enjoying life a whole lot more.

When kids move away from home it can be bitter sweet. There are no more family breakfasts around the dining room table and no more fighting for the shower first thing in the morning (at least I’m sure that’s what my folks would tell you). Yet you are excited for them to get out there and experience life, see the world and grow into their own person. There are several things I want to teach my kids before they leave home and one of the most important lessons is on frugality.

I have made the transition from relatively spend happy to quite frugal over the past several years. I only wish I had adopted my frugal way years ago! Here are some key lessons I’ve learned, or aha moments if you like, when it comes to frugality, timeless lessons that every kid should be aware of.

1. There is a difference between want and need. It seems pretty obvious that things we want aren’t necessarily things we need but the lines can blur and the distinction is sometimes fuzzy. Food, clothing, and shelter are all necessities – you actually do need these things. However, spending money on steak and lobster every night, haute-couture clothing and a 10,000 square foot house are self-indulgent wants.

Experiment with your child. The next time they “NEEEEEED” something start a dialogue – ask them questions about why they need it so bad, talk through different scenarios and worst possible outcomes if they don’t get the item. Try looking for alternatives to purchasing the item i.e. can you rent it, borrow it from the library or use a friends? Sometimes the alternatives aren’t immediately obvious but they often cost a lot less.
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Posted in Children, Education, Family, Men, Parenting, Shopping, Teenagers, Women on July 31, 2009

Tags: Tags: frugality, guest post

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How to Be a Good Son-In-Law: Building a Great Son-In-Law Relationship With Your In-Laws

This is a guest post from Jeff Nickles at My Super-Charged Life, where he shares tips, motivation and resources for living life to the fullest.

Guys, did you know that there is more to being married than just getting along with your wife?  Generally, a woman’s family is important to her.  She doesn’t just want you to have a good relationship with your mother-in-law and father-in-law.  She needs it.  Ladies, am I wrong here?

The Case for Becoming a Good Son-In-Law

Men, your wife needs you to be a good son-law and to blend into her family.  Yes, she is, in a sense, leaving them behind when she gets married to start her own family with you. But, she is going to need their support and encouragement along the way.  Trust me, your relationship with your wife will grow deeper and be easier if you develop a great son-in-law relationship with your in-laws.

Furthermore, I suggest that it is in your best interest as well.  I know that having a terrific relationship with my in-laws has been a true blessing for me.  Their love and support of me and my family has been invaluable over the years.  For example, they were there for us when an F-5 tornado destroyed our home.  In another instance, my mother-in-law took care of our newborn daughter when my wife had to go back to the hospital for a week.  I don’t know what we would have done if my in-laws weren’t so willing to help in these situations.

Having children creates a whole other reason to build a great relationship with your in-laws.  Grandparents are very important to a child’s sense of well-being.  They add depth and security to the loving relationships surrounding a child.  The better your relationship is with your in-laws, the easier it is going to be for them to grow close and be a positive role model for your children.  This is a valuable gift that you can give your kids that will serve them the rest of their lives.
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Posted in Dating, Family, Marriage, Men, Parenting, Relationships, Teenagers, Women on July 23, 2009

Tags: Tags: guest post, In-laws, Marriage, mother in law, son-in-law

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I’ve Come To Realize That…MySpace Survey Meme

I’ve been tagged with the “I’ve Come To Realize” meme on Facebook, which originated as the I’ve Come Realize MySpace Survey from bzoink.com. Colloquium and Ukok’s Place have already done their “I’ve Come To Realize” meme posts, and Judd has a weekly Sunday Stealing series where he “steals” memes from around the blogosphere, including the ‘come to realize’ MySpace survey.

RULES: “Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note completing the 36 “I’ve come to realize” statements. At the end, choose the friends you want to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you or I knew you way back when and am interested in what life has taught you!”

1. I’ve come to realize that my chest-size. . . is a gift bestowed upon me by my mother, although less would have been fine too.

2. I’ve come to realize that my job. . . is a field I got into quite by accident nearly twenty years ago and it pays the bills. I like it most days, but other days…not so much.

3. I’ve come to realize that when I’m driving. . . is a time for peace and quiet as I listen to my favorite music cd’s or radio stations, blocking out the usual stresses and problems I have no control over.

4. I’ve come to realize that I need. . . peace, quiet, love, acceptance, family, friends, structure, cleanliness, order, organization and my adoring husband to flourish in life. He recently told some people that I’m the best thing that has ever happened to him and that he couldn’t imagine life without me. Awww, he’s so sweet and I feel the same way about him.

5. I’ve come to realize that I have lost. . . the ability to accept or tolerate any “B.S.” involvement with my father and one of my grown sons, who were the basis for my article about toxic family members. I haven’t seen, spoken to, or heard from my father for fourteen years now, nor my son for three or four years, and I’m all the better for it.
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Posted in Divorce, Family, Friendship, Marriage, Men, Parenting, Relationships, Women on July 20, 2009

Tags:

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