How to Please a Woman in Bed, Pleasure and Satisfy Her Completely
This is a guest post by Lissa at Owning Pink, a website and a series of women’s workshops committed to empowering women to reclaim their health, their girlytude, and their mojo.
When Lin asked me to write about how to make love to a woman, I felt myself blush. After all, I’m a gynecologist, not a sexpert. Wouldn’t she be better served by asking some Casanova or, better yet, a lesbian? As the founder of Owning Pink: A Gutsy Guide to Getting Your Mojo Back (www.owningpink.com), I’m all about helping women embrace joy and get in touch with their authentic selves. But, how to please a woman in bed? Hmmm. My husband and I were just in the bedroom last night, working on making our own sex life a bit more exciting, so I can honestly say I’m no sexual rock star.
However, after thinking about it for a while I realized, to my surprise, that after ten years of working with women and teaching women’s workshops, I guess I have learned a thing or two on the topic. So if you’re aiming to satisfy a woman in the sack, we girls beg you, pay attention.
20 Tips For Making a Woman Quiver
1. Every woman is different. If your super-duper signature technique had your last girlfriend hanging from the chandeliers and bellowing out to Mother Mary, good for you. But don’t expect the same thing to work on your new lover. Our bodies- and needs- vary drastically. One size does not fit all.
2. A woman’s body is like an old beater car in subzero weather. It takes a while to warm her up. Don’t expect a warm welcome if you go from zero to sixty straight to her coochie. Foreplay will take you far. Our bodies sometimes need a little coaxing. So often we live completely in our heads. Our minds are spinning with thoughts about work, the kids, and tomorrow’s to-do list. If you help bring us into our bodies by arousing different erogenous zones, like the ears, the lips, the breasts, the inner thigh, the belly button, even the toes, you help remind us that our bodies can offer pleasure if we only inhabit them.
3. Love her and earn her trust. For most women, sex and love get all tangled. Not to say there aren’t some Samantha’s out there who love to just get it on. But for most of us, we see sex as an expression of love, and if we don’t feel nurtured by you, we may not get all hot and bothered when you want to shake the sheets. Love her well and earn her trust. Pleasure will likely follow.
4. Set the mood in the bedroom. Surprise her with candles, mood music, and a flower on her pillow. Whisper sweet nothings. Don’t serve up silly platitudes, but say what you feel. When we cover our bellies with our hands and try to turn off the light, tell us we’re beautiful, just the way we are. Share how much you care. Romance gets her in the mood and helps her relax.
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