Telling It Like It Is

This is My Blog and I Will Blog Whatever I Want

Yes, this is MY blog and I will blog or write about whatever I want, thank you very much. I almost titled this post, “Telling It Like It Is is Not For the Faint of Heart”, which on some levels is very true.

Over the last several months there have been an increasing number of what I refer to as lurkers, spammers, trolls, haters, naysayers and perverts emailing me and attempting to leave pathetic comments on posts.

Some of the worst offenders are those arriving from those pesky “DoFollow blog lists”, where newbie bloggers show up like a bat out of hell, dive-bombing this site in hopes of getting a link back to their site by leaving a pathetic “great blog, keep it up” sort of comment. If you have a blog of your own, you are likely well aware of these pests.

Telling It Like It Is has a comment policy and privacy policy like all/most other blogs and websites have, including a “mark as spam” button and a “delete” button, which I use quite frequently. If “DoFollow” dive bombers wish to continue wasting their time targeting this site for a backlink, knock yourselves out…but if you ever decide to check back to see if your “comment” was approved…you’ll be sadly mistaken.

Running a close second behind the dive bombers are those who are none too happy that I continue to write about child sexual abuse, especially the articles that tell kids and victims to tell they are being sexually abused now or were sexually abused by someone in the past.

I have received emails and attempted comments from people who are not happy at all that the Protect Our Children Act was passed. Now, readers, you tell me…what kind of person would NOT want me or anyone else having the “audacity” to be telling kids to tell someone they are or were sexually abused? Think about that for a minute, then come to your own conclusions.
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Posted in Abuse, Children, Education, Men, Relationships, Women on August 31, 2009

Tags: Tags: audacity, child sexual abuse, facebook, Google Alerts, stumbleupon, twitter, woopra, writer's block

20 Comments »

The Sexualization of Children and Adolescents Epidemic

The sexualization of children and adolescents epidemic has been all over the news and across the internet, partly due to the recent announcement from Mattel, Inc and Nickelodeon that Dora the Explorer is going skank, but also because of the new Tattoo Barbie, Pregnant Barbie and other toys for children and clothes that are sexualizing girls and boys at a very young age.

CNN’s headline report “Dora the Explorer Going Skank, Moms Fear” quickly became a hot topic on various forums and social networking sites including Twitter, with users poking fun at upset moms and dads who fear their children are being targeted by media moguls and marketers to grow up faster than children should.

Sexualizing children is not funny and it’s not a joke, and if parents don’t start paying attention to what the American Psychological Association (APA) report found to be the growing trend to sexualize young girls and boys through video games, television shows, movies, music videos, song lyrics, magazines, clothing styles and toys, you’ll find yourself scratching your head wondering what happened to your little prince or princess well before they reach the teen years.

The definition of the sexualization of young girls or boys means to “make sexual in character or quality”, and sexualized images suggest “sexual availability to the exclusion of other personal characteristics and qualities”, which is inappropriate, obscene, and harmful for young children.

Sexualization of Children – So Sexy, So Soon

If you don’t believe me, just try and go shopping for children’s clothes and underwear that aren’t too tight, body-fitting, low-cut, too short, “sexy”, with messages and sexualized images that say things like “eye candy”, “So many boys, So little time”, “Who needs credit cards”, “Mr. Pimp”, “Mr. Well-Hung”, all while hearing your little prince or princess repeat song lyrics like “Don’t cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me”, “so blow me bitch,” “I rock for topless dancers,” and “I tell hoes all the time, bitch get in my car.”

“Hot Tots” and “Prostitots” are just two of the descriptive urban slang terms being used to describe girls who dress like tarts, as today’s tarted-up society teaches young girls as young as 4 and 5 that body image and looking like sexy lolita’s is important, even before reaching the tween years.

The Children’s National Medical Center in Washington, D.C. sees patients as young as six with eating disorders, depression and low self-esteem, as young girls worry and obsess about their weight and physical appearance, expressing increasing dissatisfaction with their bodies at a younger age than ever before.

Young girls who are barely out of diapers are getting a little girl “princess makeover” at kiddy salons, and are being encouraged to wear make-up, skin-tight mini-skirts, push-up bras, thong underwear and high-heeled pumps, to the extent that wanting to look pretty and cute has developed into something sick, demeaning and depraved.

Sadly, some people just don’t “get it”. Some people, including parents, view the sexualization of children as something of minor importance, while the APA report concluded that young boys and girls are growing up to view themselves as sex objects and are more likely to experience poor self-image, eating disorders, depression, academic failure in school, low self-confidence, with increased likelihood of engaging in sexual activity at a very young age, due to the fact that girls who look older tend to attract more attention from boys.

The “Ban Barbie” movement is very real, as is the online petition opposing the new sexy Dora, started by authors of Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing Our Daughters from Marketers’ Schemes, Lyn Mikel Brown and Sharon Lamb, who are asking the SoCal companies to resist giving Dora the Explorer a tween makeover and turning Dora into a skanky Bratz doll saying, Let’s Go! No Makeover for Dora!. The petition asks, “What next? Dora the Cheerleader? Dora the fashionista with stylish purse and stilettos? Dora the Pop Star with Hoppin’ Dance Club and “Juice” Bar?”

“We don’t need any more tween dolls teaching girls that growing up means turning into a fashionista, excited about secrets and crushes and going shopping… Please don’t push this version of what it means to be a teenager on young girls. It limits them, narrows their options, and leads them to think that what matters most about themselves is how they look and what they buy.”

Look Like a Barbie Doll? Look Like Bratz?

Young girls, tweens and teen girls are searching the internet for information on “look like Barbie”, “look like a Barbie”, “how to look like Barbie”, “want to look like Barbie”, “look like a doll”, “look like Bratz” and “Barbie look a like” just to name few. Add “look like Dora” to that “look like” list for girls, who try and copy the look and appearance of Bratz dolls, Barbie dolls (and soon the Dora the Explorer Goes Skank doll), and the battle over Barbie vs. Bratz vs. Dora the Explorer will rise to new heights.

Do you really want your daughter growing up thinking she needs to look like a Barbie doll pop tart? What about your young sons? Boys face sexualization too, as has been seen in Calvin Klein ads, where pubescent-looking boys pose provocatively with perfectly sculpted six-pack abs hawking teen fashion clothing lines, to point out one noteworthy example.

If you don’t have daughters but you do have sons, don’t ignore or discount the effects of seeing or being around little girls who dress like little prosti-tot tarts can have on your little boys. Just because the APA report focuses primarily on girls being targeted with sexualized images and products, with 85 percent of ads sexualizing and objectifying girls in some form or fashion, the damage and harmful effects on boys is of great concern to many.

Parents, read the APA report yourself in its entirety and make up your own mind. Protect your children’s innocence. Take the television out of their bedrooms and monitor what your kids watch, and don’t allow your children to have computers in their bedroom where you can’t monitor what they’re doing online.

Don’t buy “sexy”, skanky, racy, inappropriate clothes, toys, games or other products for your children, and don’t accept inappropriate gifts for your kids from others. Learn to say No and mean No! Be the parent, not their friend.

Posted in Children, Education, Family, Health, Men, Parenting, Reviews, Shopping, Teenagers, Women on March 7, 2009

Tags: Tags: american psychological association, cnn, dora the explorer, mattel inc, pregnant barbie, sexualization of children, twitter

10 Comments »

Superbowl 2009: Superbowl XLIII Pittsburgh Steelers vs Arizona Cardinals

Today is Superbowl 2009, with the superbowl kickoff start time schedule at 6:20 p.m. EST in Tampa Florida, where the Pittsburgh Steelers and Arizona Cardinals will go head-to-head and brawn-to-brawn to decide who will win the Superbowl trophy. Super bowl coverage begins as early as 12:00 noon EST with the Matt Lauer interview of President Barack Obama. Are you ready for some football?!

Men, women, teenagers and children will be parked in front of their television sets this Superbowl Sunday to watch the super bowl, sufficiently prepared and loaded up with all kinds of superbowl food, snacks, beer, dips, nuts and various other high calorie superbowl snacks. Don’t forget to add the 7-layer dip, Mexican style for your list of super bowl foods to snack on.

Some football enthusiasts will watch the Superbowl on live stream online, while others will be following and chatting about Superbowl Ads, commercials, updates on super bowl scores and touchdowns via Twitter. I’m more interested in watching the superbowl commercials and the halftime show than I am watching the game itself, but I’ll be sitting next to my dear hubby during the superbowl, covering my ears whenever he starts yelling at the television during the big game.

Superbowl Hashtags on Twitter

If you are a Twitter user like me, follow along with superbowl chat on Twitter with the superbowl hashtags from www.hashtags.org: Use hash tags on Twitter such as #superbowl, #football4women, #ads, #steelers, #cardinals, #superads09 and #sb43ads, before and during the superbowl. There’s sure to be a lot of Twitter chatter after the big game is over, so don’t miss out on all the Twitter fun.

Who will win the Superbowl? The Pittsburgh Steelers or the Arizona Cardinals? Are you having a superbowl party at your house? Who are you rooting for? From what has been heard over the radio the last few days, bets are that the Steelers will beat the Cardinals, so it’ll be interesting to see who will win the superbowl after all.

Update:

Bruce Springsteen Halftime Show

Bruce Springsteen’s halftime show with the E Street Band had mixed reviews on Twitter, with some saying Bruce was off-key while singing his hit songs, while others (mostly more mature/older folks) understood that LIVE singing is often not with perfect pitch and tone. While keeping up with the Superbowl action and tweeting superbowl highlights throughout the super bowl, the question was raised “How old is Bruce Springsteen?” Bruce Springsteen’s date of birth is September 23, 1949, meaning that Springsteen is currently 59 and will turn 60 in September 2009.

Denny’s commercial ad became the talk of Twitter and across the net, with Denny’s free grand slam breakfast offer at all Denny’s locations. On Tuesday, February 2, 2009, you can get a free Grand Slam breakfast meal from 6 a.m. to 2 p.m, with the grand slam consisting of two pancakes, two eggs cooked to order, two strips of bacon and two sausage links. You must dine-in to receive the breakfast. Each Denny’s location has only 1,000 free breakfast coupons, as well as 500 rain checks to guests who don’t want to wait, so hurry up to get your Denny’s free grand slam breakfast if you’re interested. Search the internet for Denny’s locations near you so you don’t miss out on Denny’s offer of a free meal.

Posted in Children, Family, Men, Personal, Teenagers, Women on February 1, 2009

Tags: Tags: super bowl scores, Superbowl 2009, superbowl ads, superbowl commercials, superbowl kickoff, superbowl party, superbowl sunday, twitter

3 Comments »

Telling It Like It Is Has a New Look!

I mentioned recently that Telling It Like It Is would be getting a new theme and new host. Well, this is it! What do you think? This new theme is called Silver Light, and I like the clean, simple, content-oriented look, rather than having a site loaded with cutsey images in the header etc. There is still some tweaking to the theme and sidebar going on, so please “pardon our mess” while everything is put into its proper place.

I know I mentioned before that I planned on using the Visionary Magazine Theme, but due to my lack of knowledge and/or inexperience with coding, I decided to stay clear of anything remotely complicated that would require a great deal of time spent on editing and coding.

Creating and having quality content for visitors and  subscribed readers is by far the most important thing to me, and I believe this new theme focuses on content quite well.

On a side note, I’ve received quite a few emails from regular visitors and subscribers asking what social networking sites I frequent so they can “friend” me and chat on a more personal basis than just in the comment section.

Here’s a list of where I can be found online.

• Twitter

• Facebook

• MySpace

• StumbleUpon

What do you think of this new theme?

Posted in Blogging, Personal on January 12, 2009

Tags: Tags: facebook, Myspace, social networking, twitter

17 Comments »

Blogging War of Words – Live and Let Live

I’ve always enjoyed writing, whether online or offline. I’ve been writing for several years now, but have only had this online, very public forum to share my views and opinions on a variety of subjects for a little over a year and a half now. The internet is an amazing place for sure, where anyone with a computer can find information relating to their interests or problems from the privacy of their own homes.

Subscribing to and commenting on other blogs that interest me is also something I’ve enjoyed immensely, as there has been a feeling of community amongst fellow bloggers. That being said, there is also a growing trend where some bloggers use their own blogs, as well as other public forums such as Twitter, to criticize and humiliate other bloggers for any number of excuses.

Anyone with any real knowledge of how the internet works realizes that once your words are “out there” on the internet, they are there for the good, or for the bad. That knowledge should, I emphasize should, cause people with any sense of intelligence to be careful about what they say. Unfortunately, that isn’t always the case.

We often hear about and are alarmed by cases of online bullying involving teens in various social networking sites, but when it comes to grown adults using their words to humiliate and criticize other adults publicly, not enough is said about it in my opinion. I find it especially disturbing to hear about so-called “A-Listers” (those who have a very popular, highly sought after blog or website) who decide to take it upon themselves to publicly harass and humiliate another blogger, which occurred recently on Twitter.

Just last week one of my favorite bloggers, FussyPants, experienced the attack of the A-Lister MommyBlogger, wherein the unnamed but well-known and so-called A-Lister blogger accused Fussy of copying a half a dozen original blogging themes from other bloggers, including the use of condescending terms such as “parasitic” to describe Fussy.

Mind you, this war of words was carried out publicly on Twitter, with fans of both bloggers having a knock-down-drag-out-fight-fest on Twitter. While I agree the A-Lister has the right to her own opinion (don’t we all?), to express her opinion in the manner she chose wreaks of fear and jealousy as the motivating force behind the whole ordeal.

Another blogger found herself accidentally caught up in a blogging war, where leaving a comment that was intended to compliment and commend a well-written post created a war of words she wasn’t even aware of, unfortunately costing her a number of subscribers.

As bloggers, we all have a responsibility to understand how our opinions can offend and hurt others, and not use our blogs or other public forums to tear down and humiliate others.

There are a number of blogs I subscribe to that include posts and opinions that are sometimes completely different from my own. That’s part of the beauty of having my own blog, where I can express my personal views and opinions, and those who read or subscribe to my blog have the right to disagree with everything and anything I say. There are blog posts that talk about issues relating to whether or not porn is good or bad in marriages, but due to my very strong opinions on that subject (I’m totally against it), I prefer to not participate by commenting on those posts.

We all have our own opinions, and I’ll be damned if I’m ever going to hold back from expressing my opinions wherever I see fit, but we also have the responsibility as grown adults to be mindful of what we say and how we say it, and the impact our words will have on others. Can’t we all just learn to get along and play nice with each other?

Posted in Blogging, Friendship, Personal, Relationships, Women on July 3, 2008

Tags: Tags: A-Listers, Fussypants, MommyBlogger, twitter

7 Comments »

Top Ten Favorite Links – Second Edition

I want to share some recent posts that grabbed my attention, made me laugh until my stomach hurt, articles about parenting written by fathers, and discussions about the benefits of using Twitter.

Have you ever thought about the need to write a final blog post, often referred to as a Blog Will? What would happen to your blog if you suddenly died in a freak accident, got killed by a drunk driver or suddenly died of a massive heart attack? Kathy Frederick’s recent participation in “The To-Do List Meme” made me realize I needed to write a final blog post and keep it with my personal will and other important documents, so family members would know exactly what I would want done with my blog upon my death. Do you have a Blog Will?

I’m what you might refer to as a “work-from-home-momma wannabe”, so I was fascinated by Laura Spencer’s list of “8 Drawbacks of Working from Home” and “10 Benefits of Working from Home”. I’ve been in the workforce for so many years now that I can’t remember what it was like being a stay-at-home mom anymore, but I‘m working hard to change all that as soon as possible.

I laughed until my stomach hurt while reading Jeremy Neal’s “The Evolution of Marriage After Parenthood”, where he reveals some of the funny and awkward changes that can occur when we become parents, including bathroom etiquette, dress code and grooming etiquette, and even sex etiquette. Blogs written by dads are some of the best blogs I’ve found, and the humor and quick wit some of these guys have is simply amazing.

All parents make mistakes, and I’m no exception to that. I recently discovered Jeff Nickles’ blog since he joined the Change Your Tree Forum, of which I am a moderator. In his article, “My Three P’s of Good Parenting”, Jeff explains some parenting mistakes that he regrets as a father, and steps he took to make the needed changes in his parenting style to have a better relationship with his children.

Peter is the young father of a baby boy. In his article, “One Year On. How Fatherhood Has Changed My Life”, Peter discusses the changes that have occurred in his life since becoming a dad, and his initial thoughts and reactions since learning that he was about to become a father. Becoming a mom or dad at a young age doesn’t have to mean giving up personal hopes and dreams, but new parents often discover their priorities change once the baby is born, and find a whole new meaning to life.

Michael Martine’s “Twitter is Like Sex” is not only hysterical to read, but I really appreciated how he pointed out that using Twitter correctly means doing more than selfishly posting links to your own blog posts, without spending time to actually engage and communicate with other Twitter users. To be successful at social networking requires having a giving attitude, “Give to Get” as I’ve said before, which is why many of my “tweets” include links to fantastic posts written by other bloggers.

Many bloggers have discovered the benefits of using Twitter. If you are a husband or father with a blog, you must check out Derek Semmler’s “The Ultimate Twit List: Dads & Husbands on Twitter”, and start getting to know and begin building friendships with these great guys. If you’re not yet on Derek’s list, leave a comment with your Twitter profile link to be added to the list.

Mom and wives are also on Twitter, so be sure to check out Wendy Piersall’s “The Ultimate List of Moms on Twitter” and start getting to know these ladies. Like with the guys, if you’re a wife or mom not yet on Wendy’s list, leave a comment with your Twitter profile link to be added to her list. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, if you have a blog but aren’t using Twitter, you are missing out on one of the best online tools for social networking available for bloggers.

Building relationships with other bloggers (in and out of your own niche) is a primary component to successful blogging and getting noticed. Not only have my subscriber numbers increased since joining Twitter, but I’ve found many blogs by mom’s and dad’s that I’ve discovered and subscribed to just from being on Twitter. Don’t underestimate the power of Twitter.

Follow me on Twitter

Posted in Blogging, Children, Family, Friendship, Humor, Marriage, Parenting, Relationships on April 23, 2008

Tags: Tags: change your tree forum, good parenting, marriage after parenthood, moms and dads on Twitter, top ten favorite links, twitter, working from home

4 Comments »

WordCamp Dallas 2008

I am so excited to be a registered attendee of this coming weekend’s WordCampDallas2008 event being held just a few miles from my home, as well as having the opportunity to rub shoulders with phenomenal bloggers that I admire and respect, and have the distinct honor of learning ways to improve my blogging efforts from those with more Wordpress knowledge and experience than I have. If I hadn’t caught Lorelle’s discussion about the things you need to know about WordCampDallas2008, I surely would have missed out on this incredible chance to meet and shake hands with some incredibly talented people. Will you be there?

WordCampDallas2008 is said to be the largest gathering of Wordpress bloggers, podcasters, designers and programmers that the Dallas area has ever seen. Since moving my Blogger blog over to Wordpress, I’m confident there will be a great deal of valuable information provided that will surely help me learn more about blogging on Wordpress.

WordCamp Dallas FAQ provides attendees information such as driving instructions, local hot-spots (Can you say..Dave and Busters?!), restaurants and hotels, but since I only live about eight miles from the Frisco City Hall where the event is being held, I know exactly where I’m headed first thing Saturday morning. I’m so excited!

Just take a gander at the list of some of the attendees that will be there, as well as the scheduled topics that will discussed, and you just might understand why I’m so pumped about meeting these incredible bloggers in person.

I’m fully prepared with pen and paper to make lots of paper airplanes notes of all the great information that will be provided to everyone attending, as well as sending some Twitter “tweets” about the goings-on. Who knows?, some people are planning on bringing along cameras (nope, not me), so my mugshot ahem…photo just might suddenly appear out of nowhere on someone’s blog. This weekend is going to be oh-so-cool!

Posted in Blogging, Personal on March 28, 2008

Tags: Tags: things you need to know about wordcampdallas, twitter, wordcampdallas2008

3 Comments »

Twitter For Bloggers

If you haven’t yet discovered the benefits of using Twitter, I highly recommend you take a leap of faith and begin using it right away, as Twitter is an extremely effective tool to help you build personal relationships with other bloggers. Bloggers are constantly being reminded about using social media networks to get to know other bloggers on a more personal level as a way of networking with like-niche blogs, and Twitter is one of the best ways I have found to accomplish this.

I’m not going to provide a long, drawn out Twitter Tutorial here for those wanting to know “What Is Twitter?” and other basic information for Twitter newbies, because there is already a plethora of information on the subject, so I will simply explain how I’m using Twitter, with a few links and a video to help you understand why you need to become a Twitterer today.

It’s important for bloggers to understand that there is a right and wrong way to use Twitter, so before you rush off to sign up for Twitter and begin following other Twitter users, take the time to educate yourself on how to use Twitter properly in order to avoid the pitfalls and faux paux others have experienced that have cost them some followers.

While I do agree that building relationships with like-niche bloggers is very important, I also believe there is great benefit in stepping out of our own niche and getting to know other bloggers that can inform and teach us things we may not have known before. Although my blog niche is about parenting and relationships, I’m a blogger that continues to learn new things every day about effective blogging techniques, so why not build some online friendships with those I’m learning from even though their niche is different than my own? Twitter provides me the opportunity to do just that in real-time, as opposed to just commenting on blogs, in or out of my niche.

Promoting my blog posts on Twitter has also increased the number of visitors, comments and subscribers to my blog (Hello to all of my new readers!) by using TwitterFeed, and interacting with other Twitter users on a more personal basis. One of things I enjoy most about Twitter is providing links to discovered blog posts from using StumbleUpon (or other social networking sites) for my Twitter followers to enjoy.

I’ve often said that you must “give to get” in regards to social networking and building relationships with other bloggers, and Twitter provides ample opportunity to promote each others content and share advice, asking and answering questions, and so much more. Building relationships with other bloggers is not “all about you”, so it’s important to have a balanced view of self-promotion so as not to degrade the quality of Twitter and turning it into a selfish RSS aggregator.

Pay special attention to the 17 Ways You Can Use Twitter, as you will be amazed at the many ways people are using Twitter and reaping the benefits from it. Since becoming a Twitter user, I’ve made contact with someone locally with helpful information in my efforts to change careers, and another Twitter user has found extraordinary business leads and subcontractors for her business and so can you.

Twitter In Plain English

Who you choose to follow on Twitter is entirely up to you, whether or not you stay within your niche or if you simply seek out Twitter users that “tweet” whatever interests you, which is how I select who I follow. Don’t delay any longer, get Twitter! Oh, and if you’re interested in following me, I surely appreciate it.

Posted in Blogging, Friendship, Relationships, Reviews on March 14, 2008

Tags: Tags: build web traffic, how to twitter, social networking, twitter, twitter tutorial, ways to use twitter, what is twitter

8 Comments »

Social Networking Tips for All You Whiners

I think if I read one more blog post from someone whining about not getting any blog traffic or trouble getting your blog noticed, I think I’ll scream. Let me pull out my violin for all you online social networking whiners and play you a slow sad song. Boo-Hoo, Waah! “I want traffic, You want traffic. We all want blog traffic!” Well, so what! What are you really doing about it?! And don’t tell me, “I leave comments” or “I Stumble and give a thumbs up and reviews” or “I Zoom blog posts” or… (insert your personal favorite whine). Well guess what? So is everybody else! Now what are you going to do to stand out from the rest? To get your blog noticed, you must learn how social media marketing works and how social media optimization is vital for any website or blog.

Let me ask you social networking whiners a question: What does your blog offer that would make anyone want to visit, comment, subscribe or link to your blog? Who are you anyway? Does anyone even know you or know that your blog exists? I know, you’re probably going to tell me that you write fabulous articles/posts that are very helpful to others, and you just want people to know about them. Yeah okay, yawn. Well, I’ve got a little secret for you; so do I and many other bloggers. Now what? If you want to keep whining about it, go ahead and take a few minutes and get it out of your system, then pay very close attention to what I’m about to tell you.

Social Media Marketing

You can join all the free social networking websites that you want, but it won’t do you one bit of good unless you actively participate in getting to know your fellow bloggers on a more personal basis. Commenting on other blogs is certainly helpful to some degree, but just running from one blog to the next dropping comments in hopes that you’ll get noticed, just might get your comments filtered as spam.

Joining Entrecard, MyBlogLog, BlogCatalog, BloggingZoom, Bumpzee, Stumble Upon, Digg, Sphinn, and all the others won’t get you noticed unless you actively participate. I laugh out loud when I receive messages on BlogCatalog or MyBlogLog saying “Thank you for visiting my blog”, when I have never ever been to their blog. They’ve just ensured that I will never drop by their blog (at least not on purpose). I’ve even gone so far as to edit my email notifications of messages received on both BlogCatalog and MyBlogLog due to the high number of spammers.

Business Social Networking

The key to social networking or business social networking comes from building personal relationships with other bloggers, even those that are not in your blogging niche. Does John Chow know who I am? Probably not, why should he? I’ve commented from time to time on his blog, but I only do so if I feel I have something to add to his post, which is often few and far between. Does Darren Rowse or Andy Beard know who I am? Maybe, but so what. Why should either of them care about my blogging about relationships and parenting children and teens?

One sure-fire way of getting noticed is by taking the time to write a personal email to another blogger discussing how you were personally benefited by one of their posts, or perhaps even discussing or suggesting an idea for an upcoming post. Rob from 2Dolphins.com recently emailed me asking me my thoughts on the affects technology has on children today, thus leading me to write my post “Technology and Children – A Wake Up Call For Parents”. Had he not emailed me with those questions, it may not have occurred to me to write what turned out to be a very popular post.

Get Your Blog Noticed with Blog Links

Freely linking to other blogs or specific posts that help further develop and expound on your own post, without expecting anything in return, is by far what has worked best for me in increasing traffic to my blog. It will help get your blog noticed. Whenever I find a post that has valuable information I know will be of benefit to others, I bookmark the page and link to it in an upcoming post. You have to “give to get”, but doing so with selfish motives or expecting a reciprocal link later on down the road is ridiculous. Does Stephan Miller and Dane Morgan know who I am? You betcha they do! Get Blog Noticed!

Some people initially thought of as “controversial” or “downright intimidating” get noticed because they are actually very nice and helpful when needed, answering questions and giving helpful advice. Some bloggers may see a question you’ve posted, then write a detailed explanation in answer to your question, even being kind enough to link to your post. That not only creates attention, traffic and links, but also helps develop personal relationships amongst fellow bloggers.

Increase Blog Traffic to Blog

Actively participating in a variety of blog carnivals, or an occasional meme, can help increase blog traffic and links to your blog. I’ve seen some so-called meme’s where the blogger doesn’t actually link to anyone they’re writing about, so how is that supposed to bring attention to your blog? Give to get, give to get.

While you’re making out your New Year’s Resolutions, be sure to include taking steps to build personal relationships with other bloggers, and may this year bring you the increased attention and traffic you so desperately desire.

Further Reading:

Twitter For Bloggers

Posted in Blogging, Friendship, Relationships on January 1, 2008

Tags: Tags: social networking, stumbleupon, twitter

36 Comments »

Professional Writing Style for Professional Writers and Copywriters

Your professional writing style is paramount to success as a professional writer. For some, the ability to be a professional writer comes quite naturally, with words that flow with relative ease across the page, while others continuously struggle to express their views in a logical and coherent manner. You can become a professional writer or copywriter too. I’ve received quite a few commendations from readers in recent months, mentioning their appreciation of my “writing style”. Therefore, I felt it was only fair that I share the professional writing tips I’ve learned over the years, and hopefully these will be of help to you in your effort to be a professional writer or freelance writer. Do you have a pen and paper handy?

How to Write an Article as a Professional Writer:

1) Write It Down - Professional writers always have pen and paper readily available, no matter where they are. Yes, that can include the bathroom. Any time you have an epiphany, perhaps a topic to write about, or simply a catchy sentence you want to include in a post, write it down. Doing so helps eliminate writer’s block, or forgetting what you were sure you’d remember, but also helps create an outline you can expound on in your post.

1) Read A Lot- It has been said, “Before you can be considered a writer, you must be a reader”, and with good reason. The more you read, the substance and depth of your professional writing skills becomes much more evident. Subscribe to blogs that interest you, even if they’re not in your specific niche, making special note of their styles of writing and use of descriptive words.

1) Increase Your Vocabulary- Do you tend to use the same words in your posts? Boring, eh? Professional writers often use a Thesaurus to find synonyms of words people typically use, to spruce up (gussy up, doll up, dress up, adorn, fix up, primp, enhance, beautify, enrich, garnish) their articles. Doing so will not only widen your vocabulary for your own benefit, but your readers will appreciate you more.

1) Use Of Images- Professional writers use good images. Images can greatly enhance your blog posts or articles, especially if the images used help tell the story you are writing about. Whether your topic is a serious one, or one of quick wit and humor, strategic use of images within your post can add life and spunk (backbone, grit, moxie, spirit, guts, nerve, courage) 

1) Write Like You Talk- As a professional writer, your writing style is very important. Write as though you are having a conversation with a friend sitting right next to you. Consider reading out-loud what you’ve written, before you hit “publish”, asking yourself, “Does my post answer the five rules of writing: What, Why, When, Where and How?” There is nothing wrong with meticulous re-drafting, and editing as many times as necessary to get it right.

1) Linky Love- Link to your own archived posts, and to other blogs and websites, and do it often. This builds authority and credibility, positioning you as an expert in your niche. Linking to other blogs and websites helps build a network of like-minded associates who will in turn link to your blog.

1) Spelling and Grammar- I’m sure I have failed miserably in this area in some posts, but it’s an important reminder to check the spelling, and use of grammar, before publishing a post. I can’t tell you how many blogs I’ve been to where I initially thought, “This person knows what they’re talking about”, only to be deterred by ridiculous spelling errors.

1) Size Matters- While there has been debate regarding the merits of short or long posts, I’m of the belief that it is somewhere in the middle. Medium length posts, with links to further discussion on the subject, seems to work best. Make simple and direct points on the topic, expounding on the subject with other posts, or blog links to other blogs that elaborate on the topic.

1) Use Keywords Often- Learn search engine optimization (SEO). Not only will SEO help keep you focused on the topic at hand, but using keywords will make search engines love your blog, thereby increasing traffic to your blog. Search engine optimization and consistency is key here. The more your keywords (words people use to search for information online) are used in your posts, the better your search engine, SEO results, Technorati rankings, etc.

1) Read A Lot- It is no mistake that I end this list by repeating the importance of reading other blogs, as it cannot be emphasized enough. Who to read? It would certainly be to your advantage to read blogs solely aligned with your particular niche. However, simply stumbling upon other blogs may bring you some enlightenment in word usage, grammar, or simply entertain you.

Who do I subscribe to?

• Andy Wibbels – Andy is a Master blogger, search engine opitimization and keyword expert.
• Darren Rowse – Darren is well known and highly respected amongst the blogosphere; highly-skilled in making money online with blogging, and absolutely a must-read.
• John Chow – As of today, John’s subscriber number is shown to be 10315 readers, a truly amazing and well deserved number.

It is no mistake that I numbered each with a “1″, as each are equally important. It is my hope that these tips have been a help to your writing endeavors and developing creative writing ideas, as well as avoiding writer’s block. Do you have any tips you would like to add? Please let me know by commenting on this post.

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Posted in Blogging, Education on October 17, 2007

Tags: Tags: twitter

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